Shame: What and Why and How We Can Find Gifts Hidden In Our Shame
Yesterday in my Intentions I mentioned Shame quite a few times. I realized that I need to explain a little bit more in detail about what Shame is and why we carry so much of it. We all have shame in some form or another. We usually pick up shame in early childhood, and through traumatic experiences. Once we have shame, our whole world is then an act to hide that shame. Here is what we usually shame:
A. An aspect of our authentic self that is actually so beautfiful, but misunderstood/mistaken by our parents/teachers/peers and we are taught is wrong/bad so we dim and shame it.
B. A story that isn't even true that we have made ourselves believe is true.. usually taken on from parents/teachers/family.
C. A part of ourself that we deem as "bad," or "wrong," which again, can be redefined and looked at from a deeper perspective. Again, usually a gift that went unnurtured or misunderstood.
We need not have shame around our shame. To begin delayering our shame, we must begin forgiving ourselves and the people in our lives that unconsciously allowed our shaming to begin. Like I mention in most of my blog posts, there is NO ONE to blame. Carl Jung says "The right way to wholeness is made up of fateful detours and wrong turnings." Our shame is apart of our greater story, our bigger healing journey. I believe that our soul chooses our wounds/shame so that we can truly feel, and understand through personal experience the lessons of these wounds. As we heal these wounds we can then becomes guides for others, in our own authentic way, who have a similar wound. There is so much beauty in the aspects of our self that we shame. What I have found in my shame is: Deep Sensitivity, A strong heart full of a love that I am still becoming comfortable to share, powerful intuition which appeared as shyness, ect. Gifts!
Rumi says "the wound is the place where the Light enters you.” When we can look at our shame we are giving ourselves and the world such a huge gift. Not to mention when we have less and less shame we carry around with us, we have more energy because are not constantly putting energy into hiding aspects of ourselves. When we free ourselves from the shame trap we naturally become more heart-centred and share a deeper version of ourself. Simply, the way to release shame is to radically accept and love ourselves for exactly who we are. Releasing shame takes an incredible deep and compassionate look into ourself where we can objectively see the deeper reasoning behind the stories we have been telling ourself, why we have shamed some of our most beautiful gifts, and how the shame we are shaming is much more acceptable than we can imagine.
I invite you to sit quietly and look at what you shame. What aspects of yourself have you buried deep into your unconscious? Just ask and allow them to emerge. Trust in what comes up, know that you are strong enough to see, and release, and redefine these aspects/stories. Trust that there are beautiful gifts awaiting in the depth of your unknown. Intention is everything. Once the intention is made to uproot some of your mysterious, deeply hidden gifts, they will absolutely begin to show themselves overtime.